fact: i need to unfriend my ex-boyfriend's current girlfriend. it's just trouble. and damn you mutual friends as well...
feeling all pouty now--like everyone i decide to hate needs to go to antarctica asap. they certainly as hell cannot remain in the same timezone as me. that's just asking for trouble.
another thing which really really bothers me: everyone says they are good together. everyone says they are sooo cute. and i don't want him back, but i sure as hell don't want him happy. i mean he was crazy-evil-bastard-abusive-guy to me. and i'm still recovering from stuff he said and did to me. and when someone is that crappy to you and then goes and is that nice to someone else, you can't help but wonder is it me? I know it's not true. I know it's impossible that I made him hit me/psychologically abuse me. I can't believe it was because of me that he hurt me. It had to be something within him. But why did it only come out around me (and a little with the girl he dated briefly before me)?
the whole thing just makes me sick. and i don't think about it a lot, but sometimes it comes up cos of facebk related shit, and i've kept calm, but it's rough. when someone fucks with your mind you don't just get over it. I'm still angry. I still can't wish him anything good. I'm tired of the hate I carry around, but it's going to be a long time until I can inch forward toward releasing this.
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